I am Alive!

Dedicated to Marie Bortoli Difloure

(A dear friend who passed away after a long battle with breast cancer in 2002 at the age of 36)

This poem is a true story!

I turn this bottle upside down.
Unsteadily I stand.
I knock it to the ground.
I have a foggy memory of acting like a clown.
I can feel imbalance mound.
Toxic poison I sweat.
My emotions beset,
Hyperactivity in my head,
Angst in the red,
No luck to cease,
Loneliness appease,
Regret is my defeat.
And I swear I will never have another drink.

Sick and tired of no sleep,
Dark circles run deep.
A dark cloud creeps.
When I crash,
I weep.

I close the blinds.
Myself, I cannot find.
Too much sun,
Something’s got a hold of me and my mind can no longer run.

In the darkness deplete,
I finally fall asleep.
I have no more happiness to bleed.

In the night
I’m awoken to something startling!

A potent force,
Invulnerable voice,
 “GET OUT OF HERE!”
Instantly, I sit up in my bed with fear!

Suddenly, it becomes clear!
This voice
I recognize
From the other side.
Could it be?!
My friend Marie?!
Had she just liberated me?!
Did her spirit free me from this dark energy?!
Did I just have an unworldly release?!

After a few hours of wondering, I finally fall asleep.
When I wake
I feel warm,

At ease.

The sunlight’s rays shine through the cracks in the blinds.
I roll them up.
My eyes open wide.
My guardian angel by my side,
I have been revived.
On her wings, I glide

And I realize…


I cry,

I AM ALIVE!

Authored by Shellie Blevins